SEEING INTO SURROUND SOUND-LISTENING NEW “SIGHTS” (INSIGHTS PLUS)

“The outer conditions of a person’s life will always be found to reflect their inner beliefs”  (JAMES ALLEN)

 

“Behind me is infinite power, before me is endless possibility, around me is boundless opportunity.” – Author Unknown

In my last blog, I published the above quote by an unknown author and I wrote about the Power of Now that is gained from looking into the past with Hindsight as a Teacher. This blog is built on doing that ALONG WITH taking the next STEP (S) of seeing and listening” to the sound of an additional new voice within you. As you think about what you have endured and gone through in the past with new eyes in the now, try to give yourself grace that you are growing and developing out of past choices to be able to hear and notice boundless opportunities.                       It all ADDS up for your benefit if you learn to STOP and Listen to that INNER VOICE.

 This is why I also have the James Allen quote at the top of this blog. He wrote a book about the way you think impacts the way your life manifests. Many people do not understand this principle. It is very true, however, that whatever appears in your life has first been a thought formed in your brain. The way you think is directly related to the way your life appears. This is why I have posted this all important principle quote from James Allen.

It is still true that the outer conditions reflect your inner beliefs.

I am asking you to listen not only to the noisy outer world, but to stop and also to your inner voice. What are you telling yourself and what are you thinking about most of the time? You must get quiet and learn to listen in deeper ways. One of the ways is to see into your inner voice. Stop, Look, and Listen to your beliefs and begin writing them down. How much of the day is spent randomly letting your thoughts just wander? How many thoughts are negative? Just listen to what you SEE in your inner being.

Listening is hard for most because we are not trained to hear our own inner thoughts or certainly not to share them with others out loud. Yikes, that could be dangerous if others heard all we think, but the truth is: we hear it even if we try blocking it out. This is the main reason I am asking you to inventory each and every thought.

Slow your brain down and check in with yourself throughout the day.

 After you write them down and record them for a day or two, I have some suggestions on how you can change your life drastically just by altering your thought forms….more next time.

See you back in a couple days,

Susan
Website: 
http://www.lifehouserestoration.com
Face book: 
http://www.facebook.com/newlifesusan?fref=ts
Also follow my daily tweets for more: 
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LOOKING BACK TO GAIN INFINITE POWER IN THE PRESENT

“Behind me is infinite power, before me is endless possibility, around me is boundless opportunity.” – Author Unknown

Today’s blog is all about living in the Present! What does that even mean? So many people today express a desire to live in the “Power of Now” and while that may mean different things to those who believe it to be true, it MUST be expressed in ONE way and the only way to be able to do that is from THE Inside Out!

I have been writing a lot about how we limit our power and therefore, hide in the Shadows of Others, and let them overpower us in a multitude of ways. This is part of human training and conditioning. As children, we are powerless and must operate within the paradigms of those who are conditioning and training us. Through the developmental ages and stages, we are constantly being adapted to the system and survival, and re-formed to fit into someone else’s idea of who we “SHOULD BE.”

As I have written many times, others’ notions- of “how” we should behave plays out as WHO we are…in other words, our “who we are in identity” gets very confused and entangled with our “how we should behave” according to the rules of the situation. Think about this for a minute (or hopefully, the rest of your life). This has a huge impact. If you grew up in a rigid/controlling house, you will react or re-enact that situation out over and over many times in your life. The voices of the past influence us much more than we ever know at the time. The internal civil war continues to play out over and over until some proactive action is taken to stop the noise.

The clients I have worked with who are willing to dig deep into the past in the Present… find this process painful, but empowering. They have gained understanding of how those things “stuck” with them and to them. The truth of their past sets them free in the present to be empowered in their own inner light and light up their life in the way they feel fits their “who” more than their “do.” Giving oneself permission to be who they truly are- and live in that truth over the dishonesty of living to please others, hiding behind a Role Mask, or in Confused Identity. These conditions leave an individual with unresolved feelings of anger, mood swings, and needing to blame someone else for not being able to live the life free. To be true to self is very liberating!

 It is a childish thinking pattern to be stuck in a life that does not work for you and tell yourself some lie around that thinking, like “it is someone else’s fault.”

Empowering your infinite power within is available if you are willing to gain hindsight and look into your “past life” while updating yourself into the present. This is the beginning of tapping into the Power of Now while staying mindful that what lies behind also holds power because you can see potential in all you have survived or been through (positive times and negative times). Get INTEGRATED! Live in the Present, it is the best Gift you can Give Yourself!

See you back in a couple days,

Susan
Website: 
http://www.lifehouserestoration.com
Face book: 
http://www.facebook.com/newlifesusan?fref=ts
Also follow my daily tweets for more: 
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EVEN MORE HELP ON HEALING THOSE LIMITED PERSPECTIVES FROM THE PAST

  One of the KEY ways to keep growing taller in your ability to stay in the present while allowing healing from the past to grow and develop is to MAINTAIN A WATCHFUL EYE ON YOUR EGO.

Ego just means the times you edge God out of helping you to see things from Higher Perspectives. This is done in order to take matters in your own hands and “self protect.” We are all tempted to see things in limited perspectives. Mostly, this comes from our lack as a child to see anything from a much higher view-after all, you are short as a kid and that leads to looking at things from a pretty helpless viewpoint. Meaning in your thinking starts to feel pretty powerless so you start to think about the time when you can claim power. Most kids do this in their teen years and revert back to throwing tantrums like they did when they were two or three. Sometimes, this rebel or takeover “kid” in all of us finds a healthy balance and gets it worked out before leaving home around age 18.

Most times, however, as humans, we are out of balance when we leave the home of our childhood. We take the immature thinking and ways of acting with us, and THINK we are all grown up. We try to function like a grown up, but our ego limits us. You can spot your ego if you need to blame or shame someone else for what isn’t working out in you life time and time again. Obviously, others do influence what happens in many situations, but thinking that it is always someone else’s fault or something else’s fault that your life is a mess IS not responsible, mature adult thinking. It is a Blame Game leftover from your immature emotional ego.

Conversely, if you are falsely empowered and think you can go out and control everything and everyone through trying to bulldoze over people whether manipulatively or aggressively, that is ego. Many adults are stuck in a falsely empowered “hero” type personality that holds little regard for others. Matter of fact, it mostly is the hardest form of ego to crack through and heal AND it works very well in our culture. We admire workaholics, rescuers and caretakers. These are often the falsely empowered hero’s who take poor care of themselves and those closest to them (like, a spouse). They take great care of others and then resent it, but can’t stop since the feedback makes them “look and feel” good to others. It also sets up a feeling of “better than” others.

There are other ways to spot and take inventory of your immaturity and ego taking charge. You will attempt to make others not only responsible for your problems, but you will also project out your limitations onto them and THINK it is the other person you are talking about. In reality, most people are projecting their negative shadow onto those closest to them. This means that spouses and other inner circle people, even children, will be asked to carry your unresolved issues. A truly conscious grown up is self aware, owns their issues and is able to stay balanced, even under the pressure of others dumping their anger on them. Check your “blind spots” around this stuff.

How to self nurture your nature when “under fire” from another (others): Steady and fixed focus on esteeming yourself while under attack or accusations (with no need to defend yourself or offend the other person who is judging you). Tough to do? Yes! However, this is not only possible, but it empowers you out of the need to depend on others opinions of you….

TO BE CONTINUED:)….

See you back in a couple days,
Susan
Website: 
http://www.lifehouserestoration.com
Face book: 
http://www.facebook.com/newlifesusan?fref=ts
Also follow my daily tweets for more: 
https://twitter.com/NewLifeSusan

 

KEEPING YOUR INNER JOURNEY HEALED AND CLAIMED TO STAY CLEAR & CLEAN

Staying awake and emotionally sober has been the topic of this blog for some time now.

Since very few people are truly emotionally sober, it may be hard to connect at these

deeper and more honest levels.

 Most people want to hide themselves behind their own walls of hurts (from the past). Once you start feeling esteem toward self (about your inner being), there is often a push back or a need for others to set the record straight that you are not as great as you think. Don’t buy or sell out to that. It is a ploy to get you back in the proverbial box. Operating free of others’ perspectives of you and not allowing them to define your reality is not popular.(However, always remember that perspective in coming from the eyes of the BEHOLDER. Perspective is different depending on the angle you are looking at something or where you are coming from- make sure you are secure in looking at yourself from a Higher Power Perspective-that is the EYE of the Beholder!). In order to stay above the fray and the resistance to your changes, you will need to make sure you put more nurture to your nature.

Nurturing your nature means using the Balanced STEPS MODEL I have written about before. It is archived in this blog so you can go back and read more on that. Living life in balance of self, staying attuned to how you feel, what your thoughts are, and letting your body tell you when you are off kilter helps healing. Operating with updated ways of dating yourself means that you do not live in extremes of anything or anyone. Your perspective of how you esteem yourself must be reworked to Align in Balance with how the Highest Power that creates everything SEES you:)

You have the ability to guard your heart with rails called boundaries so when another person is having a melt down or is off the rails and wants to dump their mess on you, listen (with curiosity if they are able to speak calmly), but do not let them mistreat or abuse you. This is a key to keeping those rooms clean from other others contaminations. Your inner containers need to be swept clean of others’ dumpings! If you are confused or muddy, unclear in your thinking and feeling zones, you have most likely neglected boundaries or you are depending on old perspectives to make others happy over your own self (something like throwing yourself under the bus-self abandonment). That is a form of codependency and you do not want or need any of that:)

 When your inner self has not been well cared for, there is confusion, dizziness and other false or confused states of being. Take a deep breath, step back into reflection and inventory where this is coming from. It is most likely based on something that was programmed in you from the past (could be parent, teacher, lover, other authority-dig down and find out). Clear that room out and redecorate it with positive affirmations. Sometimes, it is just another layer of the same old stuff. It still needs clearing so you can stay clean and sober, not addicted to others’ perspectives of you.

Are you wondering about your blind spots? Are you wondering what about the areas of denial we all have or the “logs in our own eyes”?    I am glad you are doing that because you can do two things about that. 1. Ask God or your Higher Power to reveal those blind spots. If you are seeking to see them, you will uncover them!!! 2. Ask a trusted support person that is perhaps in a group you are in, like 12 step, etc. or seek help from a good counselor. It is always hard to find the right people since MOST people do not understand how past hurts traumatize us all into some sort of stinkin’thinkin’.

More on all of this and more next time….IN the meantime, Fear Not and Keep Mining for Gold (God’s Love) in your inner being. Rejoice when you find a nugget!

See you back in a couple days,
Susan
Website:
http://www.lifehouserestoration.com
Face book:
http://www.facebook.com/newlifesusan?fref=ts
Also follow my daily tweets for more:
https://twitter.com/NewLifeSusan

MORE HELP ON HEALING THOSE LIMITED PERSPECTIVES FROM THE PAST

Wow, there are a lot of new ways to SEE the world and others that are in it when we stop limiting our perspectives and the meaning we make from them. Getting in touch with our inner self and liking that person frees us up to be aware that it is loving to let others be who they are designed to be. Does that mean that we let them walk on us? Actually it results in the opposite action. When you feel the need to defend your position as right, you are often adamant and arrogant and self-righteous and frankly, annoying:)

There is none so arrogant as one blind to their unkind or mean-spirited actions that emanate from their own inner untreated self. By untreated self, I mean that a projection occurs from an inner movie that plays from any person who has not treated their pain. We all have emotional pain and left untreated, just like physical pain, it causes “dis-ease” of some sort. In the case of emotional wounds, they are projected onto others in order to dump the pain. When the emotional wound of one person entangles with the emotional wound of another, each one PERCEIVES that it is the other CAUSING the pain when really, they just are interacting at higher levels of emotional pain….very hard and very painful to see, but that is what is happening.

Most people with huge amounts of emotional pain leftover from the past have no clue as to what they are carrying. It is like driving a big rig with combustible gas and getting into a wreck with that dangerous and very toxic stuff. It is highly inflammable. I have couples that have argued like the War of the Roses for their entire marriage. As a disclosure, I will share that my own parents did this for over 70 years. It is not a relationship that is healthy. They claim love because they are so used to believing lies about how the other person really loves them and that they just “have a bad temper”….really? Is it excusable to raise children in such a hostile environment of yelling, fighting, quarreling, and then making up and pretending things are fine until the next time trouble erupts (and it will)? NO, it is not okay.

 It is not loving to keep limited perspectives and keep using the same old immature behaviors of blame, shame, and name call over and over just because you are mad. Go work out your mad and stop dumping that energy on others. OR, if you are the covertly angry one that makes nice, pretends to be a peaceful person, stirs the pot until there is a flaming fire and then, blames the other person for their reactions. PLEASE STOP THAT BEHAVIOR AS WELL. YOU ARE NOT NICE. There is no such thing as nice without doing deeper work. It is nonsense to say you do not get angry. You do, but you are used to believing anger is only anger if it is obvious. Negative control and manipulation is anger…as is sarcasm, hurtful jokes, etc. Both sides have to be operating in negative energy or there is no battle. Combat takes two or more to tangle in negative emotions. Avoidance or standing in judgment is just as negative as overt aggression. Silent treatment is not “silent.” It is actually a very painful way of mistreating another person.

ACTION PLAN:

Keep trying to gain an inner perspective on you and what makes you tick (or ticked) and give yourself grace as you continue to grow. Give that same attitude to others. Also, be grateful that you are putting childish behaviors to rest and bringing yourself up to Higher Levels of love and conscious behaviors. You will feel very WELL:)

See you back in a couple days,
Susan
Website:
http://www.lifehouserestoration.com
Face book:
http://www.facebook.com/newlifesusan?fref=ts
Also follow my daily tweets for more:
https://twitter.com/NewLifeSusan

 

LISTENING AND TALKING IN ORDER TO NURTURE YOUR TRUE NATURE

In my recent posts, I have given some new perspective shifts, along with adding actions to those. I have been writing about more mature and adult ways to listen and speak in order to keep out of the past and using “old broken ways” to communicate. Relationships do require adult to adult listening and talking in order to be understood and to feel heard.

 Continuing to nurture your own nature requires you to get in deep touch with your own inner being. Notice how others words and behaviors impact you. Let yourself move below the raw energy of anger and really feel it when you are hurt or feeling loss and misunderstood. Speak kindly to your SELF and nurture using healthy self care in STEPS (spirit, thinking, emotions, physical and social realms). Taking care of yourself in balance will develop connection to your Higher Self (which is located inside you), and will connect you to Divine and Universal love that comes from God and can inhabit you if you clean out the old thinking perspectives and the actions associated with them.

Reflecting and meditating on circumstances and issues with others is a great way to gain insight and more awareness. For example, if you have a fight or quarrel with someone close to you, reflect using inventory questions such as: What is this really about and what is the origin of why it bothers you so much. Remind yourself that others have no power to “make” you angry, but that you are angry and own it. Then, ask deeper questions of yourself that will lead to the root of that anger. Most often, the anger is rooted is a past hurt, loss or some kind of perception you have kept that ties you into triggering feelings of rejection or other fears.

It is a great feeling to begin asking that kid inside of you when these things happened and gain access to that old hurt from your kid’s perspective. I am talking about your inner kid that recorded the hurt and it can still be triggered because it is locked in a past part of your brain that gets hijacked when you experience the same feeling in the present. This sounds a little confusing, but things start to clear up that first seemed a little “muddy” in your mind. That confusion is just from old fusions from the past. That is the STUCK feeling-glued or in a bond from the past that hurt you.

 Nurturing your nature and talking in kind treatment to yourself will create an outward extension of doing the same with others. You will be more patient with their humanity and lack of awareness and you may even desire to help them find their inner path. The main thing in this part of the Journey is to stay focused on listening to self and others with presence of mind and spirit so that when you do have a negative reaction, you can get to the bottom of it.

 STAY ATTUNED TO YOUR INNER FEELINGS AND HELP REGULATE THEM WITH warm regard for yourself and others. Then, stay TUNED in here for more healing help…

See you back in a couple days,
Susan
Website:
http://www.lifehouserestoration.com
Face book:
http://www.facebook.com/newlifesusan?fref=ts
Also follow my daily tweets for more:
https://twitter.com/NewLifeSusan

IT’S ALL ABOUT SHIFTING PERSPECTIVE TO GAIN HIGHER PERCEPTIONS

One of the most important next steps in living life in more “at ease” than dis-ease is to learn to shift perspective. Perspective is the way we make meaning through how we perceive things. If we keep the same old perspectives, we attach and make the same old meanings to things throughout life.

I have always enjoyed a home that has a great VIEW. We have been fortunate to live in lovely places such as California so we could have ocean views and Colorado with fabulous mountain views or even here at the lake with a great view of the lake. However, there are differences even in physical views. It can be dependent on whether you like a panoramic view or whether you like closer views or whether you can see the ocean unobstructed or between two houses across the street. As you can see, views can be very different as can be “view-points.

As humans, we all have individual viewpoints (perspectives) and how we make meaning of them adds even greater differences. Those differences may seem like a view of the Grand Canyon in many relationships. I often am amazed at a husband and wife describing the same event from such different perspectives and arguing over who is right and who is wrong. From my “chair,” I see a different perspective. The funny (ironic, funny) part is that they are often just saying the same thing, but cannot hear the other’s words the same way as I do because of other variables, such as their history and emotional baggage from their own past.

So, the question of how to get along with others who have totally different perspectives from ours is complicated. It gets more complicated over time if we remain stuck in old perspectives and perceptions from them. This results in a child MASKING as an adult. This is a person who looks full grown, but thinks from the past which contains their childish perspectives along with more piled on as they traveled life’s pathways. I know you know these people…sometimes; they are even our closest relatives or even our partners 🙂

Not understanding how to stay relational in the midst of differing perspectives is the FUEL FOR FEUDS. These blood battles can be as personal as parent/children or other family members or the generational feuds of a whole country such as Ireland once had or the Middle East. Wars are started and battles continued for years because of differing perspectives. While I am not trying to change the world, I am interested in helping people see the “ripple effect” that an outdated perspective can have or a paradigm that does not allow individuals to listen to other points of view without aggressive behavior. It IS POSSIBLE to engage in a conversation and stay adult and mindful of respecting the other’s perspective.

The learning curve is really all about LISTENING. Most people listen with a perspective that is theirs– that is not listening.  Next time: What is Listening?

See you back in a couple days,
Susan
Website: http://www.lifehouserestoration.com
Face book: http://www.facebook.com/newlifesusan?fref=ts
Also follow my daily tweets for more: https://twitter.com/NewLifeSusan

MORE SUSTAINED FOCUS ON HEALING AND STAYING PRESENT IN THE PRESENT

I am compelled to continue writing and focusing on how all humans can stay well in the present. It is the unhealed past that needs treating that causes so many to suffer over and over. This suffering is needless once Awareness of the Root Causes and Awakening as to how to maintain and sustain “ Stayin’ Alive” and well in the present occurs. The Waking Up process is very much the Journey for Living in Wellness.

If you think in old paradigms of mad and sad, mad and sad, and keep re-creating the past, there will be piles of unresolved issues. The job is not to resolve any of the old battles, but rather to stop Civil War re-enactments. The wars we have between humans are very uncivil and hurtful. They come from old “wars” and family feuds being played out over and over. Most people are totally NOT aware or awake to this truth. They will continue the old patterns to keep the ruts going deeper in their brains. The brain is a computer and will operate according to how you program it.

Most brain think is programmed to think negatively and to try to overcome problems. That is understandable, and is part of the Journey. However, once a person has a couple of decades of experience under their belt, the truth starts to be evident. I am continuing old programs of behavior that are false and are creating more chaos and insanity in my life. This wakeup usually begins to happen around 30 years of age. However, our culture now has few adults that are over 30, even when they are 60 or 70. They are still wearing the same old childish masks to cover up immature behaviors. My generation did have a motto: “Don’t trust anyone over 30.” I guess that became a false way of believing that caused many in my generation to never grow past that age 😉How do we change focus, act functional and mature and keep that process growing?

That is such a great question. It is such a great question that I plan to do more and more sharing, some even repetitive until it raises awareness as to how to make it happen. I know there are many adults who desire change in their lives, but are stuck in feeling the helplessness of learned behaviors. The first awareness is that these learned behaviors are not the root of the problem. They are “A” problem, but only part. Your parents did not cause you to pick up an addiction. Your parents did not cause you to choose to repeat dysfunctional patterns. Your family did not cause any of your current actions. YOU are in charge of YOU and YOU can CHOOSE to unlearn the old and learn new ways of handling things. This is called taking responsibility for your life and getting some kind of help if you are stuck in the old ways or if you are desiring change, and have tried things, but cannot seem to keep them going and growing. There is HELP, but you have to want it and not go into defeat and victim.

STEPS TO change: Once again, first step is to CHOOSE the willingness to work on you.

See you back in a couple days,
Susan
Website: http://www.lifehouserestoration.com
Face book: http://www.facebook.com/newlifesusan?fref=ts
Also follow my daily tweets for more: https://twitter.com/NewLifeSusan

CHANGING FOCUS TO NEW ATTITUDES AND BELIEFS IN HOW YOU SEE THINGS

 

Over the course of my life, I have had to readjust priorities and put dreams on hold many times. I am thinking of all the times that I resisted those times, and ended up being forced to do something anyway, only to find out it was exactly what I needed. For example, I moved from NY to CA as a teacher years ago. In NY, I was permanently certified to teach for life. In CA, I have to get a Master’s Degree the way CA licensure wanted me to. I was insulted and thought that if I did not have to do that in NY, I “should not” have to in CA. “After all, I was trained in NY which had far Better” (notice the better than attitude that needed shaping:) schools than CA at the time. Well, I learned after much “fussing” that I could not avoid going back and getting that degree.

It turned out to be exactly what I have needed many times and I still use the developmental stages of life that I learned through that masters to understand clients and where they are stuck in their emotional development.

Now, I am very quick to look “into” anything that comes my way that I perceive “a negative” at first. I used to put a negative spin on most things I didn’t want to do. All that did was drain my energy and create secondary issues. I have learned to try to understand how this is going to work out for my good. IN every circumstance, when I do that, I SEE it right away. I may not have the details of how it will work, but I can see the good to come from it. This is a Universal Law. We do attract what we need to grow and develop. Most times we just didn’t know we needed that lesson to grow.

I believe God is synonymous with love, therefore, even the suffering will have a loving outcome. I see it over and over. I also see when people avoid, escape, or fight back and resist, they get more of the negative anyway. Again, they focus on negative and hate this or that, and they get more to hate. It is really simple, but complex unless one does have personal experience and is open to this truth. Once our eyes are opened to be more awake and aware, it is less challenging to shift to a new frame of perspective that is looking for the potential opportunity in all problems.

Conversely, if a person is in denial and wants to remain a victim caught up in a depressive pity party of being wronged, their choices will keep them oppressed and inviting more with the drain of complaining energy. Many children raised in this system are also blind never seeing anything different as they are taught this learned helpless way of thinking. They learn to expect the negative where there is little joy to be found.  All children will face sad and negative circumstances, but they will be able to overcome if someone tells them or shows them a new way to think about problems.

I am hoping to be one small light in those dark corners to be a voice that shouts, “YOU don’t have to live that way. YOU have a choice.” I am hoping you can raise your level of expectation higher and begin spreading the same good news from a command center within you that does speak this truth, and demonstrates more joy and laughter even before things completely change. One word of caution, though. Please be genuine. Do not buy into the old line of “fake it ‘til you make it.”

People are tired of phony and pretending. I am talking about genuinely looking for blessings and gratitude’s even in things that are awful. Please don’t say, “IMPOSSIBLE!” I have just heard many of the Oklahoma tornado survivors say they are just glad to be alive and they know that God will restore, even though they are not sure how.

As for those who did lose loved ones, of course, they will grieve and find comfort in the midst of that grief, and hopefully, a deeper awareness of Divine Love and Comfort in that sorrow so they can move forward in their well lives in spite of the losses. More next time about more of Living Well

See you back in a couple days,
Susan
Website:
http://www.lifehouserestoration.com
Face book:
http://www.facebook.com/newlifesusan?fref=ts
Also follow my daily tweets for more:
https://twitter.com/NewLifeSusan